It's Lent time....
and I have to give things up for 40 days and I know I need to (stop smoking) but... I think that I am screwed cause I have killed already. Please, let me explain... I had a mouse in my house. Please don't hate me. I couldn't cohabitate with it because my roomates are dirty enough as it is. The mouse didn't pay rent and ate my food (reminds me of my ex) it went into my cabinets and would chew through anything to get to my fresh nuts, tortilla chips, EVEN dry pasta!(brown rice pasta, mind you) and i was livid- I keep a clean house and this little bastard thought that he could come in and take over? OH, hell no...(a la Whitney Houston) I mean come on! It had it own separate room it was hanging out in and we were so scared of it that we would shut the door to that room and knock when we wanted to go in! The hairs on the back of my neck stood up everytime I went in there! He was bad bad bad and he had to go go go.

So I tell my stupid ass landlord- HATE doesn't even come close to how I feel about this man- and so he has one of his lazy assistants leave traps (forgive me- cause even if we used the traps that don't harm him and try to let him go a few blocks away BUT then he would find a way to return like the dog torturing Elaine in Seinfeld) so set them up with tons of peanut butter on them (apparently they like that (like dogs) and of course they are cheap traps (did i mention the word hate?) and the little bastard ate the peanut butter BUT DIDN'T GET CAUGHT!!!!!

And So, of course I had to bring out the big guns and get the BETTER traps and take care of the situation myself (as usual) and so i get THIS (click on the purple word, geniuses) and it doesn't work. Ok, just kidding but i do get one that DOES WORK! SUCCESS...eeeeeeewwww. I mean the traps are loud (they're not the metal ones) but you can hear them from the other room and I had just settled in to read before sleeping and SNAP! I start to shake and of course the first thing I do is call THE BRAIN (more on her later) and she is having the greatest time listening to me freaking out! I am ready to wet my pants as we go to check out the damage. Have y'all ever have your blood run cold? I have. Last night. Seeing that little bastard was so gross and creepy. And of course I didn't want to have to deal with him alone and so the MALE roomate-initials CS- was awakened and called for duty- not much help of course but I needed someone! And so the brain listened as I frantically whispered to him that it was Mission Accomplished! and he admitted hearing the trap go off AND I STILL had to talk him into getting up. And I really wish that i had a good enough memory to repeat what went down but you know what? That is why I have the brain (ok click on this one) and you will hear all of the details (if she feels like sharing).

But I do remember the female roomate- initials SS- waking up and needing to pee (They both have bladders the size of shot glasses) and being upset with me for being loud (I wasn't) and for KILLING. Of course she won't do it because she's nice (she's the only one that thinks that) and she likes "mousy" (yeah she almost shit her pants when she heard him moving around the other day- saying "i don't want to play with him") Well, you don't have to worry about that now, do you SS? And once again I save the day and should have had the cameras there.